The Hidden Cost of 'Likeability Labour' in Women's Careers

How 'Likeability Labour' is Holding Women Back

A recent report sheds light on the unpaid and often invisible 'likeability labour' that disproportionately affects women in the workplace. Authored by Amy Kean, a sociologist and CEO of the Good Shout Community, the study Shapeshifters: What We Do At Work To Be Liked reveals that 56% of women feel pressure to be liked at work, compared to only 36% of men.

The Pressure to Perform

Women are twice as likely as men to alter their behavior or speech to be more likeable. This includes:

• Withholding opinions to avoid being labeled 'difficult'
• Downplaying achievements to not seem 'too confident'
• Apologizing frequently, even when unnecessary

The Impact on Careers

This constant effort to be likeable isn't just exhausting—it's also hindering career progression. The report highlights how women are expected to balance competence with warmth, assertiveness with agreeability, leading to a no-win situation where failing to meet these standards can result in being branded as 'cold' or 'bossy'.

A Call for Change

The solution? Start by no longer rewarding popularity over competence. Encourage environments where challenging ideas isn't seen as rude, and where relational aggression is addressed. As Kean puts it, 'Women don’t need to smile more... They need workplaces brave enough to let them be brilliant.'